I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
