oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
