Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
