Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
