I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
