puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
