at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
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