Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
So much Jack, so little girl.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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