Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
