wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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