I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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