He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
