my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
foreskin is a definite game changer
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
You ate ashes out of my bong
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
