No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
