There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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