Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
