Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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