Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
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