"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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