considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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