Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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