So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
