need another drink. this is the easiest way
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
