Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
