five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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