I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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