I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
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