Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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