His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Randomize
