I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
