I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
