sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize
