it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
