So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize
