i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize
