I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
