I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
