this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
