TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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