Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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