Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
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