I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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