I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize