How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
