Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize