I think i sorta joined a cult last night
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
