Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Randomize
