On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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