Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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