Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
