she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
