yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
