I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Randomize
