u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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